A Sardar, a German and a Pakistani got arrested consuming alcohol which is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime they are all sentenced 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik announced: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."
The German was first in line, he thought for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes & the German had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain. The Pakistani was next up.
After watching the German in horror he said smugly: "Please fix two pillows to my back." But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes & the Pakistani was also led away whimpering loudly.
The Sardar was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!"
"Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness," Sardar replied. “In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not20, but100 lashes."
"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave."
The Sheik said with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And what is your second wish," the Sheik asked.
Sardar smiled and said, "Tie the Pakistani to my back"!!!
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Never under estimate Malayalees
NEVER underestimate a Malayalee
Best question is - who does Kuttappan remind all of you of? I can think of three people, minimum. But they shall remain unnamed to protect the not-so-innocent.
*Kuttappan was bragging to his boss one day, "You know that I know everyone there is to know in this world. Just name someone, I mean anyone and I know them."**
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Kuttappan how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."
So Kuttappan and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts,"Kuttapa! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Kuttappan's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Kuttappan that he thinks Kuttappan's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else", Kuttappan says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Kuttappan says, "I know him, let's fly out toWashington." And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Kuttappan on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Kutts! , what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is much shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Kuttappan who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies. "Sure!" says Kuttappan. Kuttappan and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Kuttappan says, ‘This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope.’
So he disappears into the crowd, headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Kuttappan emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
But by the time Kuttappan returns, he finds that his boss has had a minor heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Kuttappan asks him, "what happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, " Who's that on the balcony with Kuttappan?
Moral of the story -
**NEVER underestimate a Malayalee !!!*
Best question is - who does Kuttappan remind all of you of? I can think of three people, minimum. But they shall remain unnamed to protect the not-so-innocent.
*Kuttappan was bragging to his boss one day, "You know that I know everyone there is to know in this world. Just name someone, I mean anyone and I know them."**
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Kuttappan how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."
So Kuttappan and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts,"Kuttapa! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Kuttappan's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Kuttappan that he thinks Kuttappan's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else", Kuttappan says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Kuttappan says, "I know him, let's fly out toWashington." And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Kuttappan on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Kutts! , what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is much shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Kuttappan who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies. "Sure!" says Kuttappan. Kuttappan and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Kuttappan says, ‘This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope.’
So he disappears into the crowd, headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Kuttappan emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
But by the time Kuttappan returns, he finds that his boss has had a minor heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Kuttappan asks him, "what happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, " Who's that on the balcony with Kuttappan?
Moral of the story -
**NEVER underestimate a Malayalee !!!*
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